What is up with people not knowing what to call /? Last night I heard an H&R Block commercial instructing people to go to "H R Block dot com backslash money" or something like that. And today I was rotting my brain by listening to Elliot in the Morning, who was talking about the penguin game which can supposedly be found at "H T T P colon backslash backslash (etc)". What the heck? The internet is no longer a new phenomenon. And slashes are everywhere. Why do people call / a backslash when it is clearly leaning forward? I wonder what they would call \.

I also wonder whether there are any people out there typing in "http:\\www.hrblock.com\money" and wondering why it doesn't work.

# : 9:50 AM : :

At lab last week we watched a video about NMR spectroscopy and then the instructor said something about there being a lecture and a quiz on it. (He has a pretty strong Indian accent so I don't catch everything he says.) So I wasn't sure exactly what was going on this week, but since he mentioned a quiz, I thought I should probably do the reading that was listed on the syllabus, especially since I only mostly understood the video. I did the reading over the weekend, grasped the basic concepts pretty easily, and gave up on remembering which atoms and functional groups were more electronegative than others. (I know I should know this already, but that and molecular orbitals are the two dullest parts of chemistry for me.)

Anyway, so I showed up at lab today worried that I would bomb the quiz. Luckily it turned out that the quiz is later on, and today it was just a lecture. Which was SO INCREDIBLY SIMPLE. It didn't cover half of the reading; it didn't even cover all of the video from what I can recall! And people were asking stupid questions right and left! I did not learn a single thing.

This, I suppose, is why my normal habit was not to do the reading. It's much simpler to just go ot lecture and then read back when necessary to finish the problem sets. No point learning tons of extra information.

But for some reason I have this huge inferiority complex about my pre-med classes. Like when I went to the first day of BIOL 214 (a freshman course) and didn't understand all of the background about cells, since I hadn't taken any biology since seventh grade. I was really worried that I would be totally lost, so I got out the textbook and read the chapters on cells.

Then I found out that I had read a large portion of the text for BIOL 215.

I don't know why I feel the need to work so hard on these classes! It is completely un-Amanda. Maybe I brainwashed myself by accident: premed = crazy.

Actually, I think it has something to do with being so late to the party; I feel like these other people are ahead of me, and if I can't be really good it's not worth doing. Which, of course, is true. For one thing, there are already things I'm really good at, so it would be stupid to chunk those in favor of something at which I'm merely mediocre. For another, I don't want to contribute to the ranks of mediocre doctors.

...But when I was leaving class today I was wondering how kickass of a computer scientist I would have been if I'd applied myself this way to my EECS classes.

# : 9:17 PM : :

I set up a comments thingy from HaloScan at Lime's request. Here's hoping it works.

# : 3:01 PM : :

Another article in the list of "stuff I like to read because it says things I agree with".

"The basic reality is that the risks that scare people and the risks that kill people are very different," said Dr. Peter M. Sandman, a risk communication consultant in Princeton, N.J.

[...]

Chuck Gerba, a professor of environmental microbiology at the University of Arizona who has studied bacteria in home kitchens, said that he found that people who had the cleanest-looking kitchens were often the dirtiest. Because "clean" people wipe up so much, they often end up spreading bacteria all over the place. The cleanest kitchens, he said, were in the homes of bachelors, who never wiped up and just put their dirty dishes in the sink. "

Ha!

# : 9:08 AM : :

I ran across this today. It illustrates the problems with No Child Left Behind by making an analogy to dentistry - if we rated dentists based on how many cavities their patients had, it would clearly be unfair because some dentists work with an educated, well-off clientele who bring their kids in as soon as they have teeth, while some work with disadvantaged people who don't come in until they can barely chew. Early attention is just as important in education, so why penalize the teachers who choose to work with kids who are, sadly, far behind the curve?

# : 8:44 AM : :

Today was a good day. There was freezing rain overnight, so my class was cancelled this morning and I got to go back to bed for an extra hour. Then I woke up easily and was early for work, even though I spent 15 minutes scraping ice off my car.

I found out something great about my new haircut. Last night I took a shower so I wouldn't have to this morning (I'm trying to ease myself into the 7:30 class thing) which meant my hair was kind of weird this morning. So I put it up in hair sticks when I got to work, and when I was cooled off enough that I wanted my hair down, it actually looked really good. The layers are exactly right so that twisting it up makes it flip out very cutely. Probably I am the only person who would ever notice or care, but hey, that is why I have a blog, so I can make sure other people think about the important things in life.

Then they were forecasting more weather for the evening, so we got to go home three hours early. These southern weenies have no idea what "inclement weather" really is. There isn't anything wrong with the roads except a bit of slushiness. I went to see a movie on my way home, and still got home earlier than usual! (Even with, again, scraping off my car.)

I saw Lost in Translation which was quite good, though not exactly what I'd hoped for. It was very funny at times, but it had two things I don't like in movies: slow emotional scenes where half the action is in facial expressions (or worse, lack of same) rather than dialogue, and characters I don't particularly care about. Actually, I liked the Bill Murray character, but the Scarlett Johansson character was one of those young adults with no purpose in life. However, I really liked that it showed what it's like to be adrift in a foreign country. Also, the tension between the two characters was very well-done -- when you have a early-twenties female and a fiftyish male, both married to other people, what sort of relationship is possible? I think the movie's non-answer is very effective. Overall I enjoyed it and thought that it was a good film, but I'm not sure what the big fuss is. And Murray does give an excellent performance but I still think Ben Kingsley deserves the Oscar.

When I got home I cooked a pretty tasty dinner (OK, I heated a dinner kit from Trader Joe's, but it required more than one pot) and watched "Home Improvement". I can't believe I used to think that show was so good. I admit that I laughed quite a bit, but every time I felt like a moron.

Then I decided to go to the library to get more books. I bundled up and went outside to find that it was snowing more. No problem, since I was walking. I headed for the shortcut through the trees, and made it halfway up the hill then realized that the library was closed (due to weather). But I was already outside so I dropped off my books anyway, and walked back on the sidewalk through the woods. I love living where I do; running my errands on foot is great and walking in the snow is so peaceful.

I ate the last chocolate souffle for a snack. I am so proud of myself for making souffles - it requires separating eggs, melting chocolate over hot water, beating egg whites until peaks form, and "folding". I felt like a baker! And they are super tasty.

And then I decided to do something useful so I put away some laundry. I realized that I should probably stop buying socks and underwear, since I can't actually fit any more in the drawers. But I don't want to get rid of any, because they are all unique (well, except for the exercise socks, but I don't have a surplus of those), and besides then I'd have to do laundry more than once a month. Clearly what I really need is more drawers.

# : 8:55 PM : :

We got several inches of snow overnight. No free day off, unfortunately, but I am happy about it anyway.

Walking out of the building into a snow-covered world is a wonderful way to start the day. Everything is still and quiet and clean-looking. No traffic noise, and no wind, so it actually felt warm.

Of course, then I had to clean off my car, which meant standing in a snowbank. As I didn't wear boots this morning, the snow got everywhere up to my ankles, so my socks are slightly damp now. But, it's sufficiently warm in here today, so I am not grumpy about that either.

The best part was that there was no one on the road! I am not sure exactly why, but I guess all the schools were cancelled, and the government has a liberal leave policy going today, so apparently all the mommies and daddies are staying home with the kids. Or they're just too afraid to drive. I am happy about that, because I don't worry about driving in the snow; I worry about being hit by some other person who can't drive in the snow. I like it when people accept their limitations and stay the heck out of my way!

# : 9:18 AM : :

I made it through the first week of O Chem II. I was worried that I'd be way behind, since I took the first semester at Cleveland State in the summer session, but apparently it prepared me fine. I like the professor. He gives notes in outline form, which makes me happy.

Lab check-in last night was much more entertaining than I'd expected, because we got to watch this hilarious safety video. For just about every topic, they'd have an "Incorrect" and "Correct" clip. The "Incorrect" ones were the goofiest staged accidents. I've been laughing all day thinking about it:

• They load a centrifuge in an imbalanced fashion, causing it to jump off the lab bench


• A boy confuses the lab thermometer with the one his mommy used to take his temperature, and tries to shake it down. He whacks it against the bench and it shatters


• Someone holds an alcohol thermometer in the flame of a Bunsen burner. The alcohol vaporizes and the thermometer explodes. (This took longer than expected, apparently; the close-up lasted forever while we were all cringing in expectation)


• They heat a cracked glass container, which explodes very nicely


• Someone tries to force glass tubing through a rubber stopper, yanks it out, and stabs his hand (enhanced by huge quantities of great fake blood)


• A girl cuts herself on glass while running an experiment. To get rid of any chemicals, she washes only the affected hand, then touches the cut with her other hand, which presumably is also covered with chemicals, then her teacher bandages it to seal those tasty corrosives in


• When they talk about using the shower for large corrosive chemical spills, they spend most of the time stressing the importance of stripping ALL your clothes off. "Don't worry about modesty; your professor will remove the other students from the room." They show the guy taking off his shirt, then they show from his knees down while he removes his jeans with great difficulty since they're already soaked. Then they show him from the hips up while he dances in the shower trying to rinse off the chemicals, and they inform us that we have to stay in there for at least 15 minutes. Somehow I doubt that the water is heated. Brr!

I was worried that I wouldn't get into the lecture, since I didn't make it to the top of the waitlist before classes started. But today the prof said I just need a note from my boss that my work schedule means I can only take that particular lecture. I think that's a bit silly, but it shouldn't be a problem. I was considering waiting until next year to take the class because out-of-state tuition is pretty hefty (plus the books cost almost $300!) and we all know how much I dislike being poor, but today I'm feeling like I should just push ahead, take advantage of my momentum.

It's so weird wandering around a college campus that I don't really belong at. Strangely, the students look young to me already! It made me feel old, and also really homesick, since I loved college so much. It's like last August when everyone went back to class and I just kept going to work... it made it hit home that my undergrad years are over.

# : 5:11 PM : :

The other day I was thinking about the cliche that money can't buy happiness. I always accepted that, but now I don't think it's exactly true.

What makes me think that? Basically, I noticed that I'm in general much happier now than a year ago. Some of that is situational (I have something productive to do every day, I have plans for the future, my relationships are healthier) but I have the unfortunate kind of personality where I'm perfectly capable of being sad even if there's nothing actually wrong. So a lot of my unhappiness can't be fixed by solving the underlying problem, because there is no underlying problem except maybe brain chemistry or mental laziness or something.

Which means that for me, given that there's not a lot actually wrong in my life, being happier means being able to deal with the annoying sadness. Which is where money comes in -- strangely enough, having cash makes it a LOT easier to deal.

The first funny thing is that I don't worry about money now. I really thought that I always would; once a worrywart always a worrywart, right? Apparently not. Now that I know I have enough money to pay all my bills when they come due, I rarely even start worrying about how much money I have. And it definitely doesn't become a major problem like it used to.

The other major thing is that I have to feel like I am in control. A big portion of this is being able to go and do what I want, rather than being stuck in some location. Having a car makes a huge, huge difference here. In college, when I would feel closed in and want to get out, I'd have to either beg someone to drive me someplace or lend me their car, or walk (and walking can be helpful too but not in January). This bothered me a lot. But now I can just take off! If I want to go for a drive, if I want to go home for the weekend, if I want to go to the library, I can.

Watching cuddly movies or silly TV cheers me up too. This is much easier with a TV, DVD player, and Netflix subscription.

Also nice is that I have enough money to eat what I want. Being forced to choose between ramen and cafeteria food was not pleasant. Now, I have a kitchen, I can buy whatever groceries I want, and if that doesn't suit, I can always get takeout. Good food makes me happy.

Loneliness is also a problem for me. Money can't buy friends, but my problem isn't that I don't have friends; it's that most of my friends (and family) are six hours away. But money can buy cell phone service and plane tickets! I am planning to fly Emma in to visit me sometime this spring; this will make both of us happy.

So having money definitely helps me deal when I am not feeling so well. But even when I am doing fine, it still makes me happier. My bed is the nicest example of this. It is so soft and comfortable, I am happy every time I get into it.

I have concluded that, while money may not be able to buy happiness outright, it can definitely increase your happiness level if used correctly.

# : 11:42 AM : :

Considering the amount I read, I usually have a lot of trouble answering the question "what was the last great book you read?" I admit it, I read a lot of junk. Cosmo, vampire novels, formulaic thrillers... I'm polluting my mind.

But in the past half year or so, I've been lucky enough to read several books that I've found myself thinking about afterwards. Here is a list of all the ones that come to mind at the moment, arranged in approximate order from most to least science-y (though all are eminently readable).

The Demon-Haunted World, by Carl Sagan. I'm reading this right now and it's fantastic. Sagan begins by pointing out that science is probably more important now than ever, and yet the vast majority of people (including policy-makers) are woefully uninformed. Not only are they ignorant of scientific facts, but they don't know how to think scientifically. He then discusses pseudoscientific ideas that have recently caught hold (alien abduction, for example), draws parallels with their historical counterparts (e.g. witch trials), and delves into why humans are disposed to accept such things. It's elequent, readable, and fascinating.

Cryptonomicon, by Neal Stephenson. This is a geek's adventure story. There are two main storylines, one following a cryptanalyst and a Marine in WWII, and one following their offspring (a hacker and a boat operator) in the present day; naturally, these are tied together eventually.

American Gods, by Neil Gaiman. The premise is that there are many gods in America: the old ones that the early immigrants brought with them, and the new ones like credit cards, and they're fighting for turf. The protagonist is a pretty normal guy on a road trip through the heartland. The more mythology you know, the more interesting this book will probably be, but with my rudimentary knowledge I found it plenty enjoyable.

The above are important and thought-provoking; these next three are just good.

Lost Boys, by Orson Scott Card. Not so much science fiction; this is the story of a nice Mormon family forced to move to a new town. When they get there, the son seems to lose his grasp on reality, creating a tribe of imaginary friends. This is probably the scariest book I've read all year. It's very sad, and there is no shortage of villains - but overall it's strangely uplifting.

The Anatomy School, by Bernard MacLaverty. A coming-of age story, starring a young man growing up Catholic in 1960's Belfast. I'm not sure why I liked this book so much, except that it's very well-written. It's more a set of vignettes than a strongly connected plot, which makes it kind of comforting to snuggle with (even though it's more realistic than cozy).

Outlander, by Diana Gabaldon. I debated whether or not to list this book, because it's really not very good (though it's very popular), but then I decided that I enjoyed it enough to go ahead. The premise is, shall we say, outlandish (time travel through a Stonehenge-like formation), and the plot is about as realistic as you would expect, but the characters are engaging and the action is exciting. Overall I'd say it's toward the top of the romance-novel genre.

If you read any books on my recommendation, please let me know what you think! And if you share my tastes in reading material, I'd appreciate some recommendations as well.

# : 6:58 PM : :

Before Christmas there were some people going around the mall selling spa packages at a new salon. It was three visits, including hair cut and color, styling (twice), massage, manicure, waxing, and some other stuff, for a really decent price. So I bought one, and today I finally got around to going to have my hair done.

I love going to the salon - I can't believe I missed out on it for so long (and continue to, actually, since I manage to go maybe twice a year). The shampoo is my favorite part; lying back and getting a warm scalp massage is bliss.

So then I got the cut. I let the stylist talk me into something with a bit more style than my basic cut, and I'm not entirely sure I like it. You can see a bunch of pictures here. (I made good use of the new camera!) I would appreciate feedback.

I think it looks stupid over my face, but probably when I style it normally it'll be OK. I guess I'll have to take more pictures tomorrow!

EDIT 3/28/04 Link fixed. (Thanks Radagast.) That'll teach me to use relative links.

# : 7:32 PM : :

It's really cold in here. Apparently the lab and the server room are served by the same air-conditioning unit, and it's impossible to control the temperatures separately. So, since the server room has a bunch of expensive electronics pumping out heat, the A/C needs to be cranked to arctic levels. I have my down coat draped over my shoulders, my nose is cold, and I'd be wearing gloves if I could type like that. Today I looked for space heaters online and it seems like all the decent ones cost 80 bucks. I should not have to spend that much money to be comfortable at work, dammit!

The next few months are looking really busy. I'm still waitlisted for O Chem, but now I'm #6, up from 12, and classes start on Tuesday. So it looks like I will actually get in. Which means two lectures and one lab per week, plus one evening of volunteering, and studying for the MCAT as well. Chemistry is my big problem there; I understand all the physics and bio so I just need to review to have all the equations and terms fresh in my mind. And the verbal portions aren't the kind of thing I would study for. But the chemistry, oh man. Although I find some topics interesting, as a general subject it is probably the dullest thing I've ever studied. And I don't seem to have learned very much of it!

I may be traveling a fair amount as well. My boss came in this morning and started talking about sending us on week-long trips overseas. I might get to go to some really cool places. That is, of course, in addition to the planned spring break cruise, which I am really excited about.

# : 1:55 PM : :

I impulse-bought a craptastic $10 digital camera. Two inches square, no LCD preview, 640x480 maximum resolution. But hey, $10. I am amused.

I don't really have anything to take pictures of just at the moment. Clearly, I need kittens. But here is the view out of my window. It's blurry because the silly camera is so light I can't hold it still and press the shutter at the same time. Oh well.



Sorry about the file size. I can't edit jpgs in Paint, and the software that came with the camera has the worst sort of slow, blobby, can't-do-anything-useful interface.

# : 3:47 PM : :

Lake Superior State University's Banished Words of 2004.

I want to add to the list: "pop". (No, I'm not talking about soda; I decided to embrace my Midwesternness and continue calling it pop.) Every time I pick up Cosmo, I have to read about how a certain eyeshadow color will "really make your eyes pop!"

I DON'T WANT MY EYES TO POP.

Placing the words "eyes" and "pop" next to each other just makes me think about the real fragility of my eyes. You know what pops? Grapes, when you step on them. You know what is shaped like grapes? Yeah, I don't have to say it.

# : 3:33 PM : :

Sometime in the fall I applied to volunteer at a local hospital, and I finally got an interview the other day. The volunteer coordinator was very helpful - when she found out I was considering a career change, she sat down and took my work schedule into account in assigning me to a volunteer area that will be as helpful to me as possible.

So I have training tomorrow, then TB tests and IDs and things like that, then I start volunteering in Patient Services on Monday evenings. I'll be running errands, delivering flowers, that sort of thing, until I have a grasp on the basic way everything runs and am familiar with the hospital layout.

Then I'll switch to early mornings (hopefully 7-10 so I can get into work at a not-ridiculous hour) one day a week in the post-anesthesia care unit. Obviously I will still be doing errands and clerical work, but I'll get a chance to talk to the staff and see what it's like. She also said I can probably arrange to come in and observe surgery on my days off from work. I am really excited, and feeling lucky because from what I've heard most volunteer opportunities involve minimal patient or staff contact.

# : 12:52 PM : :

Adam is 2 and a half, almost three. My aunt and uncle had been telling him the Christmas story pretty often, and one night when they were putting him to bed he announced that he wanted to tell THEM a story. My aunt wrote it down, printed it out, and framed it with a picture of him to give to the grandmas, which is how I got to see it. I made a copy to post here:

Jesus was a baby...

And he growed and growed and growed

(Did he grow?)

and he carried his little lamb...

he was wrapped in a blanket... in a stable.

And He's ALIVE!

and his Momma was Mary...

 

 

and Mary went POTTY!

# : 3:07 PM : :

We went to see the baby lion again!



Look at my original post to see how much he grew! He's huge now! He also has teeth, and tries to roar. He's not very successful though; he kind of goes RaAAar!

We found out that his name is Simba and he's an orphan because his mom died giving birth to him.

He's not lonely anymore because he has friends in his cage: a slightly smaller female white lion and a housecat-sized baby spotted cat which I think is a leopard. It's really cute because they all play together and love each other. Simba is a really nice big brother; he lets the leopard crawl on him and ride him. Also he sprawled out on his back and allowed the leopard to play with his tail, which I thought was very generous.

He still feels just as fuzzy and cuddly as before, but I think now he figured out that not all big warm people are his mommy, so he is a bit squirmier.

# : 5:08 PM : :

I'm back after a wonderful vacation at home. And I'm refreshed! I enjoyed coming back to work. I think I've already accomplished more work in January than I did in December.

Also, so far I've gone grocery shopping, called Cox to cancel extra services (I'd been putting that off since November I think), cleaned off the dining room table, made curried chicken salad for today's lunch, mixed up a marinade for tonight's dinner, registered for my classes at GMU, and called to schedule a volunteer interview for tonight.

So yeah, I think I'll be pretty busy this spring. I am on the waitlist for the O Chem lecture I really wanted, but the other one has 23 openings so I think that's safe. I got into the lab I wanted. And it looks like I'll get to start volunteering soon! I'm excited.

The new baby lion picture, along with more stories, will be up soon.

# : 2:25 PM : :

Don't Have a Cow, Man

I haven't read it all, but there were a few great quotes:

We can be assured of one thing when it comes to the safety of our food: media hysteria will be inversely proportional to actual risks.
...
Those fretting about mad cow probably think nothing of taking a bath (which kills 320 Americans a year), walking downstairs (which kills 1,421 Americans annually) or driving their car (which kills 42,000 of us each year). Our odds of getting vCJD from eating British beef, said the CDC, is about one in ten billion.

I just love finding scientific articles that back up what I always say.

# : 2:18 PM : :